Jennine, you seem like a strong, clear-headed woman.  I was under the impression that women like us didn't get cancer, so what a reality check that was.  Well, maybe we aren't immune to cancer, but those attributes help when it comes to the the medicine for it.   It is truly wonderful that you have such a big support team in your family. 

The weirdst thing for me was that this disease showed up when I felt most aliented from my "previous" life.  I had an antique home I loved, a busy life full of friends at grad school; then hard times, sell the house, empty nest, seek employment - and a big move back to FL where I grew up but don't like, kind of how you don't like LI  - I love NE and lived there for 30 years, but I came back here to get a real job.  So I got the real job and the health insurance, and cancer, too.  I do have a dear son here, who is there for me, but he is of the opinion that one "thinks" their way out of "challenges" so I do appreciate his love - I just needed some empathy, too.  My three sisters are all over the country, I had to give away the love of my life, mi corazon Jubal Lee, a big Chesapeake, I could not handle him, and work and two cancers, and chemo - he is with a sea captain, and I am jealous - but my heart broke, what else can be taken?  I was pretty damn desolate - not depressed, but desolate in a very clear-headed kind of way.  And then I found Gina's site NO SURRENDER - and the very real men and women behind the site.  Truly a God-send.   In every real way, I had people to share this experience with me on a day to day level and have been so blessed by their wisdom.   Even now, finally free of 6 months of chemo (also AC+T), preparing for the radiation in a week or two, it is to this site I come to recharge - I worked all day, but I am weak.  

Chrissie,

I must admit, I'm getting a little nervous approaching treatment. I don't have a treatment plan yet, but getting closer. Everyday I am enjoying feeling good, healthy and all of the other things I tend to take for granted, including, brushing out my long, thick, dirty blonde hair.

My father has been chronically ill for over two years. After his triple by pass he never recovered. He was diagnosed with MDS (a blood disorder) to sum it up, his bone marrow is not working. It's not cancer, they call it "pre cancer"
My dad has blood transfusions at least once a week. Now he needs platlets and other meds to counter act the excess iron. He had to have chemo, but it didn't help him. He had a port, then developed an infection, then, had the port removed. He told me yesterday he must have been stuck over 200 times since his diagnosis.
When he told me these things it took all the strength I had to hold back the tears. I hate that he has to go through this, I hate it.
I was afraid to tell my parents about my DX. My mom has been through so much with my father, I didn't want to put the extra worry on her. But I knew if I didn't tell her, she would have been very upset with me. So I did, but it broke my heart.
My father has always been like Hercules to me. I am the female version of him, I look like him, have his temperament...and so it goes..
The two us are going through similar experiences, (emotional, physical, fears) not pleasant true, but I wonder why? I spoke to my dad yesterday, he can be a real sage when he wants to be and he really made me feel better. He told me, don't be afraid,  you do what ever you have to to, and God will take care of you. :-) 
 Oh, one more thing, he told me, despite what I went through, Get a port! What happened to me, WON'T happen to you.

My dad had always been his own man, a strong European, a stubborn Greek.  He never took anything, including asprin. I know this has been hard for him, but yet I admire him for enduring it all. He offers words of wisdom to his daughter, even if it hurts him to even "go there" with me..